Some thoughts about Gay

Okay, okay, I’m about to contravene my second law of blogging, but here we go:

Homosexuality. Some men like women. Some men like men. Some women like men (except when they leave the toilet seat up!) and some women like women. Often these are not the same kinds of women that are in the films about women liking women watched by the men who like women. If you follow me.

This is a matter of biology. Perhaps also of environmental factors, I don’t know. What it is emphatically not is a question of ethics or morality. One way of doing things is not inherently better than another. Frankly, it amazes me that otherwise reasonable people in the 21st century could persist in the belief that homosexuality is somehow “wrong”.

It is not enough to say it is wrong but somehow you “tolerate” it. Think how you would react if someone said something about you was offensive but they tolerated it. Do you feel good about this? Wouldn’t you (correctly) assume that they still found the original behaviour repugnant? What if this something was a facet of your character engrained so deep that you couldn’t possibly change it?

It is my fervent wish that everybody who reads this will agree with what I have said. Not because it pleases me in general to have people agree with me, because in general this is not something that concerns me. In fact, I am delighted to disagree on any number of things with any number of people; it tends to be more interesting that way. No, the reason is that this is something that is absolutely fundamental.

If you disagree I would very much like to hear about it.

Anyone who wishes to point out that you cannot engrain a facet needs to watch their step though! This is more important than a crap metaphor!


8 thoughts on “Some thoughts about Gay

  1. I am assuming Welshy deleted her comment! I agree, although I do dislike agreeing with you because you always think you are right and you are not! The “tolerate” part was interesting because I have to admit that while I feel everyone should be treated with equality, I have no desire to see two men play tonsil hockey in front of me. Thinking about it, I have no desire to see a man and a woman play tonsil hockey in front of me. I however would like to play tonsil hockey but GC is never around when you need him damn it!

  2. By the way, I “tolerate” you when you think you are right all the time, but it does not mean that I find you repugnant in any way.

  3. You assume correctly. I don’t play the deleting comments game!

    Okay, point taken about you not finding me unpleasant just because you tolerate my mock* superiority, but you must admit that tolerance is a world apart from acceptance.

    For me I guess, my real reaction to homosexuality is indifference. That isn’t to say that I don’t care about the associated trials and tribulations that might come with being gay in this hard, hard world, but whether someone is gay or not is a bit like whether they have brown hair.

    And PDA should never be tolerated! Whether man-man, woman-man, dog-man, or man-hand.

    Wrong, wrong, all wrong!

    * I had to put “mock” in, as I am a master of self-deprecation as well as all other things.

  4. And it seemed wrong to comment on Welshy’s deleted comments, even though I can see them.

    I will respond when and if she reposts.

  5. How can you see them?! They are gone! Anyway, comment on them if you like because I think I am less crazed today! But I am interested in the tolerance/acceptance/indifference thing. I think where I lie is somewhere between tolerance and acceptance because I believe that both of these things can happen without agreement. And why is indifference ok, but tolerance not?! Surely if you believe something should be accepted (as you seem to) then it would be wrong to be indifferent…?

    PDA – grim in all and every sense. I thought a bloke was trying to clear an obstruction in his girlfriend’s throat the other day, as they felt it necessary to PDA at a pelican crossing!

  6. I agree with you, Chris. I’ve always felt that to ‘tolerate’ something is to find it unpleasant or inferior but to endure it. I ‘tolerate’ body odour on a train, for example. There is still an underlying feeling of my own superiority and a recognition that the smelly bastards are at fault in some way.

    To me, to be indifferent to something, however, does not imply any hierarchy of virtue or value. I think it is even more morally neutral than ‘acceptance’, which still implies that there is a choice to be made.

  7. The reason I can see your deleted posts is that I get an email when someone comments. And that email doesn’t of course get deleted when the comment is removed.

    I think an important point here is that I even think saying homosexuality should be “accepted” is too weak. It shouldn’t need to be “accepted”! It just is! Men, women, dogs, cats, giraffes and whatever else have been at each other like so many matching sets of knives for literally thousands of years.

    So that is what I mean by indifferent; it doesn’t interest me as it is a banal fact of life. What gets my emotions heaving is the attitude some people display towards this fact of life and the divisions that arise accordingly.

    And I think I have basically repeated what Meva just said, but probably less well. So that has irritated me! But you are still welcome here!

    This may extend itself into several posts, so I apologise if you liked the silly rock thing more. In fact I will put another of those up to introduce some comic relief. Hang on a mo…!

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