New candidate for worst friend ever

Here are two “unrelated” conversations.

Conversation One

Other person: “I have this book on how to make sure your wedding goes smoothly.”
Me: “Good idea, Other Person.”
Other person: “It says here that if you don’t particularly want someone to come, you can just say things like ‘I know you have a long way to come, and I am sure we can find you somewhere to sleep on the floor’.”
Me: “Ha ha, very amusing, Other Person.”

I’d say comfortably four minutes later, the second conversation took place.

Conversation Two

Other Person: “Ooh, I know! When you come to my wedding, you and Juliet could camp!”
Me: “Um, well I’m not sure if that would be suitable, Other Person. After all, we will be quite smartly dressed.”
Other Person: “I mean, we don’t exactly have any facilities… and really it’s just a field with a few bulls in it… but I’m sure you’d have a great time!”
Me: “-” (this is actually me, speechless)

The eagle-eyed amongst you may have noticed that this new candidate for Worst Friend Ever is in fact the same person as the old candidate. The question is this: Does Welshy want me to go to her wedding? What should I do?!

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12 thoughts on “New candidate for worst friend ever

  1. Sounds to me like you are on the “people we have to invite but don’t really want at the wedding” list. That Welshy, she really is a wenchy woman isn’t she? I think you HAVE to go to the wedding and you should park your tent on the front drive of this fancy place where the wedding will be!

    Welshy, I believe you owe someone some coffee now!

  2. Nooo! Surely it didn’t really happen like that?! Oh dear… (Makes mental note: read chapter again; obviously not subtle enough…)

  3. *giggles uncontrollably*

    p.s. Ouh! Miss Welsherella! As being part of the underbellies of two weddings, i can assure you that there is NOTHING more painful than the guest list and table settings. Especially when they come at the last minute! Oi vey!

    p.p.s. Oh, Mister Chris, very unwise to mess with a bride. Very very unwise…

  4. I’d say you’re on the obligatory invite list. Decline gently and make sure you have something way better to do that weekend.

  5. Chris: you two are very much on the “must be there or there won’t be a party” list – you may not decline!!!! Who else can I seat next to my great uncle Albert if you don’t come?! 😉

  6. Hee hee. You are very canny for noticing! Some men would never ‘get’ such subtlety 🙂

  7. I don’t think she wants you to come although I can’t think why because you seem lovely. And if you’re narked, I’m sure you’ll find a way to get back at her 🙂

  8. She DOES want you to come! Honestly! Oh dear… Even though I know that you are not seriously upset by this, Chris, it would seem that others are…! And you are always so nice to me, it makes me feel awful…

  9. Hey Chris, after some high praise from my brother, I’ve decided to have a look at your blog occassionally. You should feel honoured. Do it! Now!

    Welshy, could you let me know how you get on with the whole “somehow getting Chris not to attend your wedding” thing? I also happen to know a guy called Chris, who I also don’t want coming to my wedding, although I quite like his girlfriend, Rebe…Juliet (still can’t get the hang of that) and want her there.

  10. Yes I am a very subtle person, beware all you females who misunderestimate me!

    Don’t worry everyone, I also have very thick skin.

    Welshy, you muppet, it will take much more than this to get me not to come. I will delight in telling dear old Uncle Alb many tales of your misspent youth at Aberystwyth University, and all of the many (fictional) things you used to get up to beneath the pier.

    Richard, you have declared yourself elsewhere to be a muppet so I will not do it for you. But just watch it, you. As Pom says, I am a man of remarkable subtlety, and something tells me that there is a hidden insult in what you write… Just you wait till I find it… In the meantime, good luck getting rid of this other, unrelated Chris, he sounds like a nightmare.

    PS Feeling very honoured… I will try to slip in a “lo” or two in future posts to show my appreciation for your visit.

  11. I’m not being a muppet; I would love love love for you to sit next to Uncle Alb! And I wasn’t serious when I said you are always so nice to me. Just thought I should clarify that one.

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