I am bored

… and how have I assuaged my boredom today?

1. I discovered that I can email my canteen at work.

Dear Canteen,

I have just had a portion of your strawberry cheesecake. Mmmm! It was delicious; thank you very much.
Unfortunately, in my excitement, I accidentally ate the small sprig of mint that you placed on top as decoration.
Is it edible? Will I be okay?
Yours faithfully,

Chris

——–

Dear Chris,

I am sure you will be okay.
Regards,

Wendy

——–

Dear Wendy,

How about if I am allergic to mint?
Would this change your response?
Kind regards,

Chris

——–

NO RESPONSE

***

2. I telephoned a company called Carter Construction.

Receptionist: “Hello, Carter Construction.”
Me: “Hi there. I’m calling about a sign you have placed outside my house. You are about to build some luxury apartments, penthouse suites and duplexes.”
Receptionist: “Ah yes. And which are you interested in?”
Me: “I’m not. I’m interested in the fact that you have put an apostrophe in the middle of duplex’s, as if the duplex was owning something, maybe one of your luxury apartments. It is upsetting me. Would you be able to take it down?”
Receptionist: “Uh… I’m sorry…? What was the problem, exactly?”
Me: “You have a spelling mistake on your sign. It should be D-U-P-L-E-X-E-S. It will put people off buying your luxury apartments. You need to replace it.”
Receptionist: “Uh, of course. Yes, I’ll get someone to look into it for you.”
Me: “Would you like to take my name and contact number?”
Receptionist: “No, no, that won’t be necessary.”

If they haven’t done it in a few days I am going to e-mail them.

So, what have you been doing with your day?

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7 thoughts on “I am bored

  1. I think you should email Wendy in the canteen tomorrow! That is fantastic, I love it! And I think it is priceless that you called the company with the misspelling on the sign, how very Chris!

  2. Wendy seems a little unfriendly, I am going to go up there today, and see if I can work out which one she is.

  3. Do they not wear nametags?

    Speaking of which, you may want to not wear your nametag to the canteen for a while, lest Wendy assault you with immense bushels of mint.

  4. So, Chris informs me that I must comment on his blog to prove my love for him. This seems a little unusual but here we go…

    Both of those were hilarious dear. I hope you really will keep them up next week. Maybe you could arrange a meeting with Wendy to discuss matters. The apostrophe thing is very important. I know you hate Lynne Truss, but maybe you could use her punctuation repair kit to fix it…!

  5. Stephen – they do indeed wear nametags… that was going to be the principle way I would “work it out” although now you have destroyed the mystery! *Chris hangs up deerstalker in recognition of poor detective skills*

    Juliet, I think I will keep them up, they are important. Well the second one. I don’t hate Lynne Truss though, just don’t think we should be idolising someone who makes a grammatical error on the front of her own book.

  6. Chris, Chris, Chris. You have WAY too much time on your hands (I am envious!)
    Oh for the days of being a PA when I finished all my work and e-mailed the world!

  7. I make the time for such things.

    I put off something less important. (Work.)

    Anyway, it was a very serious matter.

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