Three surgeons

Three surgeons were playing golf. They were comparing their skillz.

“I’m a great surgeon,” said the first, one Mr Neutrall, a prominent Swiss surgeon. “Zere was zis man*, a pianist, who lost seven fingers in a freak piano accident. I sewed zem back on – he was playing to a standing ovation at ze Royal Albert Hall in London wizzin ze year.”

The other two didn’t look impressed.

Ms Bogan, an Australian surgeon, piped up: “That’s okay, cobber**, but I had this bloke, he had both arms and legs blown off in a freak wearing-a-hat-with-corks-on-whilst-drinking-beer-and-being-a-mysogenist accident… It took a while, but I reattached them and within 12 months he was winning the Gold medal in the Butterfly.”

The Texan surgeon adjusted his belt. “That’s real nice,” he said, “but I had a real challenge back in Texas a few years back. There was this cowboy, he rode his horse into a train going 80 miles per hour… sustained terrible injuries. All I had to work with was a horse’s ass and a cowboy hat… and now he’s President of the United States.”

I think that’s enough from me today.

* Zis is how ze Swiss speak, in my head.
** Er, yes, never mind… fair dinkum.

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9 thoughts on “Three surgeons

  1. BAHAHAHA!

    That’s too freakin’ funny.

    Now I’m gonna have to copy/paste and send it to all of my non-blog-reading friends! 🙂

  2. Chris, I am shocked! Shocked you could ever mock this great President! Oh wait a minute, he is a horses ass! Mock away my friend, mock away!

  3. That surgeon should be embarrassed rather than proud. I think that patient belongs in the “oops” pile.

  4. Crikey!

    That’s not how we bloody speak, you drongo. Stone the crows!

    hehehe, I love it – “a freak wearing-a-hat-with-corks-on-whilst-drinking-beer-and-being-a-mysogenist accident.”

    I was going to say you did spell misogynist wrong. But then I went to confirm the spelling and found that I was going to spell it wrong whilst scolding you.

    Remember, kids: when you point a finger at someone, there’s three fingers pointing back at yourself (go ahead, point at your monitor, it’s true).

  5. That’s really funny! (How appropriate, the verification code is ‘funbox’!)

  6. Amber, you may find they have heard it already (I hope not!) but I did alter it from the form I first heard it in, so at least it should have something new in it!

    Even if it is only the misspelling of the word misoge… nope, still can’t do it!

    Molly, I couldn’t possibly comment, as I do not live in your country… oops, did I say “your” country… you dirty illegal. I mean that fine country that you live in!

    Jay, hello! Don’t worry, the surgeon is fictional, thank the lord! I don’t think a real man would have been able to live with himself. :o)

    And Richard… is he your leader? Where is he leading you exactly?!

    Southern Belle, it is exactly how you speak and you know it, just like I am always saying “crumbs” and “oopsy daisy” (bugger, actually I do sometimes… bad example!) – I was just upset I couldn’t get the phrase “I was rapt” in there!

    Myso… Misoj… Misso… Fuck!

    Get out!

    [sulk]

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