Guerrilla dentistry?

I had a filling just recently. It was very painful, mainly in the wallet area. This is because I am “band two” NHS which is far too complicated to discuss now.

As I went back to work with my silly lolling jaw, (not to be confused with a LOLing jaw) I was of course subject to the ridicule that talkingg lyike thish entails.

Irritatingly, however, I was also subjected to the following conversation:

Person at Chris’s work who will remain nameless: “So you had a filling then?”
Me: “Yesh.”
PACWWWRN: “I don’t have any fillings!”
Me: “That’sh lovely. I am so pleashed for you.”
PACWWWRN: “Yes, I have excellent teeth.” [followed by a smug look]

It really pisses me off when people try to claim it somehow makes them morally superior to have no fillings, and to suggest that I do not look after my teeth properly. You don’t get the same thing with broken bones do you? This is even more true when it is invariably, as it was on this occasion, followed by this conversation:

Me: (irritated now) “So, exactly when did you last go to the dentist?”
PACWWWRN: “Oh about 12 years ago. I have very good teeth.”

I’m sorry?

Where exactly is this person expecting to pick up a filling? In the street? When she falls asleep on the train? Maybe I will do one for her next time she yawns.



13 thoughts on “Guerrilla dentistry?

  1. Anyone who says “Chris’s” is incorrect will face the full force of my wrath this time too.

    So watch it!

  2. Ooh, I will leave the “Chris’s” issue alone then, don’t want to upset you now do we?!

    Fillings are not just because you have neglected your teeth, they are for other reasons. Apparently Ned has grooves on his teeth that will cause fillings in the future and the dentist said this is hereditary. As I don’t fill him up with candy, I am more inclined to blame my parents than my own parenting skills!!

    The Person At Work Who Shall Remain Nameless is stupid and should be named for all to ridicule!

  3. The person who shall remain nameless actually is very stupid yes.

    Maybe I will post more about her.


  4. Maybe she just has a high pain threshold? Or maybe, if she is as stupid as you’ve asserted, she has no nerve endings in her entire head?????

  5. I hate people with ‘good teeth’. Mine look okay. But trust me, they’re rotten to the core, and it’s because they’re so big. Lots of nooks and crannies (as opposed to crooks and nannies) and tight spots.

  6. Acton B, love it. I will share this thought with other colleagues.

    Here is a recent conversation I overheard:

    This person: “I was nearly in MENSA.”
    Other colleague: “Are you sure it wasn’t MENCAP?”


    Meva (sans Mevettes), big teeth, big nose… maybe you should be a famous person? Everyone knows they have slightly bigger heads than “normal”.

    I have just reread that and see it could possibly appear offensive… not intended that way I promise!

  7. Ooh yeah. I get that. I recently have had 5 fillings done/redone in the space of a few weeks. My health care paid for about half of the costs.

    Stupid co-workers are always good blogfodder.

  8. Dentists are proper con-artists. Really, they just like playing with drills, and want paid for it. They make the holes in your teeth. I’m convinced.

    Your colleague needs to die though.

  9. Do not even mention dentists in my presence. I have to go and throw myself on the mercy of an NHS dentist sometime very VERY soon as my teeth are highly tender and I’ve got a feeling that my wisdom teeth are going to make a final appearance. Am not thinking about it. *fingers in ears* la la la la la….

  10. Don’t even get me started on fillings! Much sympathy! I take care of my teeth very well and I have been at pains to do so since childhood- yet when I got a new dentist 3 years ago, suddenly I had to have 9 fillings (In the end she only did 4 of them over the space of a couple of weeks, telling me that I needed more, and when the receptionist saw me crying, I said to her I didnt understand why I was suddenly having to have 9 fillings when my last dentist (6 months before) had not told me I needed any. She then got the head of the practice to look at my teeth and he declared that I didnt need fillings, but needed sealant put on my teeth. And so he is now my dentist, not the unpleasant young lady who had almost drilled my teeth!

  11. LMWBUTO (Laughing my wonky but unfilled teeth out)!!!!!!!!! Until Kezzie’s comment, of course, which made me want to stoke her hair and tell her it’s all ok and she won’t need to see the nasty lady ever again.
    Still laughing, really, though. Sorry, Kez 😦

  12. Sorry Meva.

    Everyone take a moment to acknowledge her big hair.

    Shoop shoop!

    Phish, they are indeed, although it is a risky business, as I would not like them to find out most of what I think of them!

    Liam, so you are not a dentist fan then?

    And that is a little harsh on the work colleague… unless… you don’t know her do you?!

    Ellie… er, sorry!

    Quick everyone, talk about Dr Who or something.

    Poor Kezzie… she does not sound like a very good dentist! My dentist is actually very nice, I should point out, and although he had to inject me three times as the nerve was hiding behind a tooth (not his fault apparently!) he was and is very good.

    Welshy. You bad person!

    PS I am beating you at Scrabble, ha ha!

    Ahem, sorry.

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