So… my electricity bill came today.

I will paraphrase: “Dear Mr Chrlog, you may need to increase your Direct Debit as the £30.00 you pay per month may not cover your current usage. Please pay the following amount as soon as possible: £1,578.86.”

… Er, I’m sorry?!

One thousand, five hundred and seventy eight pounds?

One thousand, five hundred and seventy eight POUNDS?

One THOUSAND, five HUNDRED and seventy eight POUNDS?

One THOUSAND, five HUNDRED and seventy eight POUNDS?

I suppose on the plus side, the 6% discount that I get for paying by Direct Debit actually worked out to be quite a reasonable amount for a change.

Of course, I phoned “one of [their] friendly and helpful advisors” and we sorted out the problem. For those who like a happy ending, my bill turned out to be the slightly more reasonable £13.40.

In the last month I have

1. Nearly had to pay £1,578.86 for electricity. (See above, are you not paying attention?!)
2. Nearly been taken to court for non-payment of council tax. (They had spelt my name wrong.)
3. Nearly had my water disconnected as my house is vacant. (“Dear Resident, we are cutting off the water to this postcode as we have no record of anyone living there.” Uh, hello? Dear Resident? Are brain cells going out of fashion?)
4. Nearly had my gas disconnected as I hadn’t paid the bill. (Actually, the same company do my gas and electric and they had set up two Direct Debits to my electricity and none to my gas – smart move. Perhaps they had predicted they were going to charge me £1,578.86 a couple of months later?!)

I am displeased!!

So, how have you been?


6 thoughts on “Electrickery

  1. What the hell?! So glad you sorted that one out, that would have put a little dent in your pocket now wouldn’t it?

    Are you enjoying being fianced?

  2. That’s really impressive. I mean, I know the people handling the utilities are useless and all, but they’ve really raised their game.

  3. I think I would have hit the floor when I opened that bill. That is truly unbelievable. Glad the final figure was a bit more reasonable!!

  4. a) congratulations, a bit late, i’m afraid. but fantastic. really!

    b) our electric bill averages $20 USD. imagine our consternation when we received a bill for $85! yeah. somehow the shock value is lost when you have to throw your 1,000 plus pound story out there, doesn’t it?

  5. Our gas supplier wanted nearly £700 and the water wanted nearly £600. When that was sorted out the total was less than £100. Although the meter number on my gas bill is not actually the one on the meter, so tomorrow will bring further entertaining conversations…
    I am going to the dentist tomorrow. And seeing your fiancee for coffee and house snooping (mine, so not as much anticipation on my part, really, I suppose) on Monday x

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